Tag: love

I Deleted Three Articles in the Name of Love

Posted on by
I am sorry

I’ve been writing about my experiences in dating older men. And although my aim was to show how to look at stressful situation with humor, to some people my stories were hurtful. That was not my intention. On the other hand I could see how those stories can bother some people especially if they are the men that did such things.

So, to keep the peace and love others, I deleted the three articles. I did not have to delete them, they were my creation, and I have the freedom of speech. I did not use anyone’s name, date, or any identifiable detail. However, I am Pro-peace, and I must love. How can I love others? I know I like to bring peace to others soul, and Love is not just a feeling. It is an active and conscious emotion.

The Bible says that Love is patient; love is kind. It does not envy; it does not boast; it is not proud. It does not dishonor others; it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hope, always perseveres.

So, I must choose to do these things. I am not the most patient of persons, and I am proud. So I must work on calming myself and listen. I show patience when I actively listen. I show I am humble when I admit I need help and seek help. So, by taking my articles down, I am showing I am willing to love others, by giving respect to my elders and when we show respect to authority even when they don’t deserve it, we show honor. So, I am honoring others.

I am not self-seeking. I seek to be happy within me but do not seek wealth by taking from others or what others have. Being easily angered is a hard thing to control. For me, when I get angry, I go for a walk or jump in my pool. I must step away to keep control, but I am working on it. I can let things go without having to spend an hour at the gym, making all deaf with my music.

I can’t keep a record of wrongs. The good thing of having a mental episode is that my mind works differently now. I can keep secrets like a champ because I will forget them as soon as I am told. I can’t hold a grudge. However, I will remember how I felt, and that will fuel my prayers. I do not like the evil things that are happening in the world; I dislike to listen to the news. When I was younger, I wanted to help others, that was one of the reasons why I served in the Army, but even there I mess up so many times. My Soldiers used to ask me to park my broom in a safe place every morning. And today, I am retired and have no TV. I get my news through the internet news.

Love protects, trusts, hope, and perseveres. So, think about it. It is a hard job to love someone that we have a sexual and romantic love that binds us and is supposed to be our husband or wife, so imagine having to love all people around us. Paul is asking a lot in this Bible verse. Some people are best to love them from a distance, and I haven’t found any verse that says we must be chummy and best pals with all. But we do have to love others regardless of who they are. That is a hard thing to do. There are so many irritating people.

But, because I made up my mind to honor myself, my family, and my G-d, I am following this template. However, I had to find my internal love first. I had to learn to love me first and now that I have reached that level of acceptance and love for me, now, I can love others as I love myself. And those that I think are assholes; I will still love them and pray to the Lord to help them be a better version of themselves.

So, I deleted the three articles, because I am trying to love the two people that contacted me and I hurt with the three blog entries. But wait, I am not a saint. I am a helion that can’t get her head out of the books most days and can create havoc in an instant. So, do not think for a second I am nice. I am just trying my best not to mess up this chance of life. Hugs to all!

Have a blessed day

When I learned to Love Me

Posted on by

I am in Love. No, I am not in a relationship. I am so in love with my life, with me. For a long time, I tried to find happiness outside of me. I looked for love in trinkets, in experiences and I looked for others to fulfill me, but none of that worked.

This is me. I am Omayra. I hated my name. I have no middle name. I am Omayra. It is not a common name. I love my name. It has taken a long time for me to be comfortable in my own skin. I lived many things that had shaped my character and taught me many lessons.

I am not sure what the future brings. I have many things I will like to do and places I will like to see. However, I know that even if I don’t get to do or see them, I will be happy because I made up my mind to be joyful either way. Life is too short. I wish I could live to see two hundred with youth and energy to experience things and create things, but I know that will not happen. So, I am making the best with what I have. What do I do? How do I live? I learned that material things could be stolen, lost, or destroyed, so do not place your heart in material things.

On the other hand, things are easily replaceable at least some are. However, people can never be replaced. So, I learned to be careful to treat others like I would a cherished family member because they are irreplaceable. Am I always successful? No, I am human, and I am a Veteran with a low level of patience, that tends to use colorful language when I am stressed, with a dark sense of humor, and some people get offended easily lately.

Furthermore, I will not compromise my values, loyalties, and religious beliefs for any human. But I will respect the sanctity of a person’s right to be just as human as I. How about you? Where are you in this journey? Let me know in the comments.

For now have a blessed day

My New Name, Calixta Harlow Carlyle

Posted on by
Calixta Harlow Carlyle

Calixta Harlow Carlyle is the name of the Character in my new book The Vanquishers of Alhambra, Calixta. I love this name so much I am considering changing my name, last name to it. I wrote the story, and by far, it is my favorite. I keep going back and re-reading it from the start and marveling at the plot and imagining of what is happening to the characters.

You might say I have an unfair advantage being that I wrote the story and I have the image in my head, but the truth to the matter is that each time I read the story I let myself reinvent the imagery in my mind and things take a different look. Even Calixta looks different every time I reread the story. Her face changes a little, her mannerisms are more refined, and she is more sophisticated each time I read her dialogue. 

The other characters are so alive that I have even started a new story based on a secondary character. I must publish this story soon so I can purge Calixta out of my desk and my concentration can then go fully to my other projects. The fourth book of The Assembly of Thirteen is waiting patiently. It is 40% written. However, the outline may change a lot depending on my decision on if to finish the story in five books or six.

But for now, Calixta is the one that needs my attention. I am writing other books, although with a lot of difficulties. Even these little entries take much of my time to write, but I do what I can.

For now, you all have a blessed day

Better Than a Kiss

Posted on by
Hanukkah celebration in Iraq

In Iraq, my best friends were both Jewish. They did not have a vehicle to go to their service, but I did. So every Friday, I gave them a ride to receive their Sabbath, and I waited until the service was over to give them a ride back to our area.

I did that every week, and I stayed for the service, so they included me in their family, and I became an adopted child. I even learned the prayers and songs and was respectful of all the traditions and was expected of me as a gentile. I loved my friends, and I was made to feel welcome.

On Hanukkah, we had boxes of things sent to the Jewish community full of things to eat and enjoy during the festivities and among them were these jars of chocolate that were to die for, and I wanted it. So we played a game for the last jar. If I remember well, it was a simple six degrees of separation with movie stars. And Lieutenant Seiden and I had a draw, and neither one wanted to part with the price.

In the end, we took a picture, opened the jar and we ate the chocolate together, between the ten of us that were still joking and laughing at the table. It was a great night, and I wish I had stayed in contact with all these excellent people, but we were all from different units, and that is the nature of war and the Army.

Till this day I don’t know what happened to handsome LT Seiden. I hope all is well with him, and he got promoted and married, and the Lord had blessed him and his family in a mighty way.

As for me, I am writing, and getting the house ready for my sisters who visit over the summer. And I still have that feeling that I will have a friend visiting this summer. I do not know who the friend is. The Lord knows who he is I just know I must have the pool ready. And like a Latino family, we are having a BBQ. Plus, the Bible does say in Hebrews 13:2 Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing, some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.

Hey, food, music, and ice tea, it’s hot in Florida.

You all have a Blessed day

A Stolen Cup-o-Coffee

Posted on by

This big boy is Dexter, my English Springer Spaniel buddy. He loves coffee, and I found out the stupid way.

Back when I was living in Maryland, I was sitting on my floor working on some charcoal sketches. The dog was sleeping near to me, and I laid my cup-o-coffee by my side when the phone rang. I left everything and went to get the phone. I was away for about five minutes, but it took precisely that for Dexter to drink my coffee.

He is an amazing dog and has outgrown his love for coffee because we do not let any cups near him. In this picture, he has a face of “I don’t care, cause I enjoyed the coffee. But please, Mom, don’t be angry at me.” Needless to say after his cup-o-coffee he was crazier than a squirrel on caffeine.

He is a loon and a happy old dog.

Have a blessed day